Q2 2025: Life by Sow, Wrapped
read along as I find the morals of the stories behind my experiences from this past quarter
Today is July 1 - which means 6 months of the year have passed, and 6 months to the year are left.
And so, even though I set out to do a quarterly reflection today, I find myself slipping into a daydream sort of haze and thinking back to where I was exactly a year ago. And how so much has changed and shifted. The change isn’t just in individual aspects, but in entirely, as if you’ve taken me and fully placed me in a different plane of existence where nothing from my past or even my old self belongs. There’s so much to say here about the plurality of the self, but that’s for another article (coming into your inboxes so very soon!)
But one thing feels emergent as true: that we are never really meant to be fully prepared. Things change - sometimes by choice, sometimes by unexpected circumstances. Life reroutes us - sometimes gently, sometimes all at once. And yet, we always find our way. It’s this realization that where we are right now, whether on top of a mountain, or at the bottom of the barrow, is just a stop and not a state of permanence. The ground keeps moving, and we keep becoming.
Hopefully this serves as a little something to think about as we approach the second half of this year. To believe in yourself and in your dreams with all your might, because you have no idea how much life can change if you believe that you deserve it. To dust off anything that knocked you down in the first half of the year, and use it as feeder to jumpstart anything you wish to do or be this second half of the year. To not let people or shifts distract you for too long. To allow yourself to become and become again.
And in the spirit of becoming, I wanted to take a beat and reflect on some things my mind and body did become through the season of Q2.
The Happenings (ft. the Moral of the Stories)
Boxing: Sweat, Ego, and Choosing the Right Room
I’ve been regularly boxing for the past 2.5 years, typically in an upscale boxing gym with group classes or with a personal trainer in 1-1 sessions. Through March and April, I would go to Rumble, since it was the closest to my parent’s house and it was a solid sweat - even though I deeply disliked how it wasn’t a place to get actual feedback on your boxing form since the gym catered itself to the casual boxer who goes for cardio, compared to a boxer who is training to be a fighter.
I found myself constantly booking front row, catching compliments from fellow gym-goers and the coaches after sessions. Coaches would come up to me to ask me my name and ask if I fought or trained for a while since I looked like it. And it made me feel good - shot my ego really.
But I knew this wasn’t the place for me if I wanted to keep training to spar and fight. I decided to try out a different boxing gym in May - one that looked like it was straight out of the Rocky movies. It looked rugged but real in every way. It smelled like pure sweat, and not like eucalyptus oil. There was no life inspirational pep talk given during or after class outside of a “you know you can do it else I’ll have to reset the timer!” when holding a V-up or running laps with a 15 lb medicine ball above your head.
I went to the first class, a part of me expecting to be at least the third or fourth “best” in class - only to have my butt absolutely whooped. I felt slow, I felt weak, I felt… lame. The conditioning workout was like none other, and my heart was beating out of my chest half way through the class.
On the drive home, I just thought about signing up with Rumble again - it was a good workout and didn’t botch my ego. But I didn’t. I forced myself to show up the next day and signed up with the Rocky gym. Somewhere deep down, I knew I would rather be uncomfortable in this new gym that I knew could make me a better athlete - rather than be comfortable in spaces I knew I already thrived in.
Moral of the Story: It’s been a bit over a month and driving to class still makes me a bit nervous - but I get better everyday, mentally and physically. Comfort doesn’t make you better; discomfort does. Staying humbled and grounded and growing over being praised and staying still.
What I Took With Me When I Left My Job
After six years in corporate, I quit my job in May to take a break before school. I expected to feel excited, and maybe even relieved. But what I didn’t expect was how emotional it would be - not just because I was stepping away from the rhythm and routine, but because I was also leaving my people. These were people I grew with, built products with, laughed in Slack threads with, saw me at my best and my worst, and always championed me.
Since people knew I was leaving for a while, I got waves of emotional messages for a few weeks. Notes of appreciation, memories, and little things I wasn’t even expecting like a virtual farewell.
I miss my team and my work a ton. And I feel the weight of everything that I journeyed through my 4+ years at my company - not just as a worker, but as a person in a community.
Moral of the Story: Sometimes impact isn’t just measured in outcomes and accolades, but also the quiet, meaningful relationships and community you build along the way.
Adulthood = Greater Appreciation for Strangers Turned Friends
Over the past couple months, I’ve slowly started meeting future classmates from grad school that I’ll be starting in the fall. I met some people on campus during admit weekend, others during happy hours or random dinners, and each time, I’ve left feeling a bit more lit up. These are sharp, curious, interesting, and super friendly people who I’ve had such a range of conversations with. With some, our walls immediately broke and we burst into silly humor; and with others, we shared the exact same professional dreams and they inspired me to dream bigger - in such a short period of time of knowing each other.
It can be rare, as an adult, to feel like you're about to enter a new chapter filled with new minds and new energy. And it’s exciting to feel like I’m right here on the cusp of it.
I also realize that I’ve been lucky to have found new friends in adulthood time and time again. And even within this last quarter, I was reminded of that at a very palpable level.
I traveled to Mexico City with my best friend Jules, who I met during my first job at the ripe age of 21.
I went to Rosarito on an extremely impromptu trip with my family and two other families - one of whom I only met when I was 22. And now, their Gen-Z kids gang up with my other family friend kids as they tease me for being too old. I let it pass assuming it’s their language of love (my coping mechanism).
I had several days of coffee runs and drinks and laughs with coworkers turned friends, from the job I started when I was 23 and held on till a few months ago at 27.
I spent this last weekend at a retreat in Oceanside with my team-turned-family at Rickshaw Film Foundation, a non-profit I’ve volunteered with since last year, but who’s been in my life since I was 23.
I went to New Orleans for a bachelorette trip for a fiancé of a friend I made during a Writer’s Room at the age of 24, who I also became close to during the last few years.
I had a couple of heart-to-hearts with my ex-roommate in LA, who I met through a friend of a friend when I was also 24, as we devoured down the best toro sushi in LA.
My lovely friend, Seeret, who I met during a film set at the age of 26, instantly handed me her apartment keys and insisted I spend the night at her place in LA when she heard my plans had fallen through. (an actual angel)
Moral of the Story: It’s overwhelming in the best of ways to think about how we haven’t yet met everyone who’s going to matter to us yet. And there’s something really beautiful about that.
A Hitting Realization: Your Problems Are Strictly Only Yours.
I spent a large chunk of this past quarter just journaling, going on long walks, and caught in between that space between daydreaming and ruminating. And after some therapy sessions, conversations with friends, and late night kitchen table talks with my dad, I’ve come to realize a simple truth with a clarity that I’ve never felt before: no one’s ever going to get your sh!t - not fully. So what really matters is learning how to hold yourself through it, and finding that strength from yourself. I write more about that here.
Moral of the Story: We’re all a little alone. But that doesn’t mean we’re lost. It means we learn how to listen inward, and how to lead ourselves forward. And when we’ve mastered that, we’re unstoppable.
The Outtakes
Another special moment that makes me proud is Rickshaw getting to screen Nice Indian Boy, and having Roshan Sethi and Karan Soni with us during the Q&A. It’s a testament to how big and impactful Rickshaw has gotten as an organization, while staying grounded. And on a personal level, getting to know them as people beyond just the filmmakers they present themselves as, during the screening and a team dinner after, felt inspiring and energizing. And surreal, even; the younger version of me who moved to LA at 23 having no understanding of the movie world beyond just her dreams to be creative would be pinching herself.
I would also be amiss if I didn’t give a very well deserved shoutout before I wrap this section up: all the new coffee shops and matcha I discovered these last few months. As a freshly minted (f)unemployed person, I spent countless hours at these new spots, which served both as my sources of muse and makeshift office desks. No place like a coffee shop to get my mind flowing.
What I’m Looking Forward to the Most this Q3:
Traveling across Europe with different groups of people - college friends, to-be grad school friends, my cousin - and a little stint by myself. Traveling always brings out the best of me, and I’m so excited!
A 10-day Vipassana right before school starts. I hear it’s one of the most difficult things you can do for yourself - and I’m sheepishly so excited.
Absorbing more slow-form content like books or movies, compared to short-form videos that compete for our attention. Hoping to lean into this more through a modified, sustainable morning/night time routine.
Giving more thanks to my family, as I recognize that this may be the last time in a long, long, long time my family unit of 4 gets to live under the same roof. Also an incoming Substack series is love letters to my brother, mom, and dad. Truly my everything and more.
Discovering more coffee shops (with stellar matcha) through my travels and while I have some time here in SD to keep my stomach happy and my creative juices flowing
Continuing to develop my pitch plan as my dreams to help independent filmmakers continue to grow and grow. I hope to lean into the exact energy that I explicitly wrote down earlier in this blog post: To believe in yourself and in your dreams with all your might, because you have no idea how much life can change if you believe that you deserve it.
Thanks for reading, my dearest friends on the interwebs.
As always, I deeply appreciate your support. And as ALWAYS, I would so love to hear from you not just with what may have resonated / what thoughts you have, but also what you’re most excited for these next few months coming up. Whether that’s just continuing to dream, continuing to experience the world, continuing to build your relationships, continuing to work towards your ambitions.
And for whatever that means to you, I’m sending you the best of energy from my space to yours, to hold what’s close to you, trust that the dots will connect and that your dreams deserve love, and to welcome change and gifts when they do knock on your door.
Very well said sow akka! Im excited to hear about your trips in the future unc! :D
Such a momentous H1 you’ve already had, cannot wait to follow along for H2 🤩